Coffee – then adulting.

It’s 10:30 p.m. My son peers out of his room (where he should be asleep) and asks, “Mom, have you ever made a mistake in life?”

I think I’m about to have another existential conversation with a very curious 7-year-old. I mean, this is the same kid who asked me if I liked “being a parent or a kid more” while we shopped for frozen pizzas. That was not something I was prepared to answer. I was just trying to decide on cheese vs. pepperoni, thin crust vs. thick crust. Not sure I was prepared to explain the complexities of aging and paying bills in Aisle 9.

I guess I could have used it as a learning experience. I would’ve tried to explain in some half-ass fashion how choosing a pizza is more complicated. As a parent, you have to consider cost, ingredients, and shelf life, etc. As a kid, you get to decide on cheese or pepperoni – and then reap the rewards of that choice.

When you’re caught off guard, you don’t have time to plan out your response. I’m not one of those moms you see in a PBS kids’ show. And I’m no Danny Tanner from Full House. I can’t do thoughtful responses on the fly. I need more time.

Before I lose my own train of thought – back to the birds.

He points to my blue T-shirt. It shows the popular TV personality Bob Ross painting birds over a mistake in his art. The phrase reads: “Ever make mistakes in life? Let’s make them birds.”

I’ve made plenty of mistakes, that’s for sure. If only we had the choice of painting over them with birds rather than owning up to them all.

I didn’t say this to him, but simply replied, “of course.”

This kid has a knack for asking random questions about life. He would probably make a good philosophy professor one day. For now, it’s bedtime, which I am sure I’ve reminded him about a dozen times.

I’ll think of a good response while I fall asleep, so I can be prepared for the next random question.

If you know me, you probably know that I’m generally a pretty private person. There are many reasons for starting this but here are a few.

1. I have a new laptop. Now I must use it.
2. I miss writing. Even if no one reads what I write.
3. We all have a voice, and many of us don’t use it enough. Some of us use it too much. But I figured that we can all gain from hearing each other’s thoughts. This especially true when it comes to the trials and tribulations of having kids, and really just “adulting” in general.

The truth is I started this blog entry above in April of 2019. It’s now 2025. In other words, that was before a new job, before the world shut down for a pandemic, and before we moved 3 times in 3 years. And before the crippling anxiety about the future of our children’s generation – and basically, everything. Now, the laptop I started this on is the last one I would use due to its turtle-level speed. But, the reasons I started this are the same.

We live in a world where we outsource so much. This is especially true now, thanks to AI. But I want my thoughts to be mine. I want them to be authentic – even if no once cares to read them.

It takes bravery to ink our thoughts on paper. Maybe all we need is a good cup of coffee, first. A sip of vino might also help. So here goes nothing…better late than never.